Results from the Northside Region

#1 Holiday Inn Bar 72
#8 The Elk’s Club 57

Snaggletooth celebrates The Holiday Inn’s blowout victory by
dancing to Hey Y’all at center-court, throwing her panties at Gumie
in the stands, and requesting to borrow The Spirit Stick for the evening
[Yuck!]


#4 Roland’s Hi Li 66
#5 The Bear’s Den 67

Roland’s Hi Li had an open look at a no-jump lay-up
at the buzzer to win the game, but Sneadger came out of nowhere
to Tayshaun Prince that “weak stuff” halfway to North Canton.
But even in defeat, Roland’s does win the award
for the best Gin & Diet Pepsi in town.


#3 Ruby Tuesday’s 43
#6 Muddy Miser 46

The Muddy Miser is miserly on defense, as Ruby Tuesday’s
is left to contemplate whether or not removing their 1995 Cambridge
Basketball Team photograph from the restaurant’s entrance lobby
has created a Boston Red Sox-like curse:
the Curse of the Bam-GENO.


#2 The Forum 86
#7 East End Tavern 68

Southgate Parkway tops Sunrise Center as The Forum’s defense
blankets the East End Tavern like feta on a Greek pizza.
[Greek pizza? I thought this fucking place was Italian?]